June 29, 2016

June 29, 2016

Could you also fix my cable while you’re here? 911 dispatchers receive a number bizarre calls every single day. But Nevada’s Clark County Fire Department was receiving a rash of requests that weren’t exactly life-threatening. At a recent press conference, fire chief Greg Cassell implored the public to stop calling for “stubbed toes and sore throats.” Another example given by Cassell were calls lacking important information, such as “Gary’s not breathing.” Firefighters would arrive at a residence to find Gary was not a human, but a golden retriever.

Saying “bye, son” to your bison. A pair of visitors to Yellowstone National Park really messed up when they placed a bison calf in their car because they “thought it was cold.” Seems like sound reasoning to assume an animal that  survived the Ice Age needs to warm up in your Toyota Sequoia. What’s most unfortunate is the calf was later rejected by its herd when returned to the wild. Yellowstone veterinarians then had no choice but to euthanize the calf. Pro tip: Leave nature alone.

Call your mother or face the consequences. Many Eastern cultures hold the elderly in very high esteem, often times living with and personally caring for their parents until death. Shanghai officials were so intent on ensuring these octogenarians are looked after that they’ve now legislated the issue. Any person who doesn’t “visit or send their parents greetings often” will have their credit scores lowered.   

The curious case of coloring. Adult coloring books are all the rage these days. Wanting to relieve the stresses of adulthood is one thing, but hasn’t this gone a bit too far? Grown men dressing up and reading comics; women watching children’s cartoons. Frozen. And now – coloring books. It’s gotten so bad that there is currently a global pencil shortage. Way to go “grown-ups.”

Regrexit. We’re all well aware now that many in the U.K are wishing they could go undo their recent decision to wave bye-bye to the E.U. (at least, once they realized what it was). While the British are crying because there’s no take backsies, someone thought it would be fun (or terrifying) to think of names for other E.U. exits. Here’s some of our favorites:

  • Austria: Oustria
  • Czech Republic: Czech-out, Czech-off
  • Germany: Angeleave Merkel
  • Hungary: Full
  • Ireland: Byerland
  • Italy: Quitaly
  • Portugal: Abortugal
  • Sweden: Swedone

Heaven can wait. Dr. Henry Heimlich, the man behind the maneuver that’s saved countless lives, finally got his turn to awkwardly thrust himself into someone’s back. At the spry age of 96, Heimlich dislodged a piece of food from a fellow retirement home resident using the classic technique that made the nonagenarian famous. When asked how it felt to perform the maneuver after all that time, the doctor replied, “That moment was very important to me. I knew about all the lives my maneuver has saved over the years and I have demonstrated it so many times but here, for the first time, was someone sitting right next to me who was about to die.” You’re important to us, Henry.

Happy 4th of July! We hope you enjoy celebrating our country’s 240th birthday!

Quote to note: “It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought but not accept it.” – Aristotle, 384 B.C. – 322 B.C.

Thanks for reading.
@LedlieGroup on Twitter

Consistent crisis work kept The Ledlie Group busy in June as we continue to help clients with promotional materials and creative copy. We are grateful.

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